Lately, I have been having this ongoing conversation in my own head about the words I use to  talk about myself. The other day I attended a class where the presenter recommended “learning your language,” which is basically how you talk to yourself, about yourself, and to others about your life.

I decided to start with something small but that was repetitive.

One of the most common words I use is “busy.” Busy is not synonymous with living but sometimes we forget.

How was I going to transform my answer to the countless variations of the following questions:

How are you?
What have you been up to?
What’s new?

My default is to minimize anything that I am doing that I feel good about or that shows I am chasing down a big goal. Already a sign about my language (and mindset).

And then I throw in the word busy and say something like:
“Oh, you know busy with work” or “Keeping busy”

Sometimes I say I am busy because I figure they don’t really care for full detail. Other times I say busy as a catchall because the honest answer might take a while. But I wanted a more affirming answer.

I went through some iterations:

What have you been up to?
Me: Retraining my amygdala
(too clinical?)

Me: Healing the trauma that life can be at times.
(Too accurate?)

Me: Building the life of my dreams.
(Hmmm closer but that’s a little too humble brag)

Me: Being thoughtful about how I spend my time and energy.
(Warmer)

Me: Living more intentionally and learning how to build margin in my life.
(Yes! I like that but…)

Me: Focusing on having more fun!
(We have a winner)

This weekend my challenge to you is to learn your language. What are your default responses to commonly asked questions (out loud and in your own head). I feel confident we all want to have more than “busy” on our epitaph.

Sunshine & Sarcasm,
Lowi & G