Some days, weekends especially, I CANNOT GET ANYTHING DONE.
These humans and non-humans that live with me consume all of my time. Some days I just want to sit down and do what I need to do.
On Friday night, I told the hubby that my goals this weekend, while not lofty, were to walk both days, work out, write my blog and get some things done around the house. At the outset, let me just say that I did, in fact, walk both days, I worked out on Sunday morning and I started writing the blog about 7:30 pm on Sunday evening. You might be wondering what the big deal is if I accomplished my goals. The big deal is that my list turns into the stuff that gets done when nobody else needs anything.
So, what did I actually do this weekend? Washed the cars, drove a forgotten calculator up to the school, discussed our wills, took EVERYTHING out of our office desk and put it in the dining room to make room for a new desk, moved all 45 pieces of the desk to the garage (okay I mostly held the door), vacuumed out the office, washed the baseboards, made meals, helped Reese register for some exams, picked up a bridesmaid dress, took the puppy outside 148 times and ran to the store to get miscellaneous items for above mentioned humans. I also watched basketball, went out to lunch with the hubby, hung out with friends and took most of their money in poker night so it wasn’t ALL bad.
As I sat down to write and reflect on the weekend I started scrolling through social media. Not a good idea when you are already feeling less than. Then it hit me. My frustration with the weekend was not about my list. It was about my lack of intention. Right there on social media I saw post after post of people living out their intentions. Their reality doesn’t matter, it’s my perception of their reality. What I was seeing in their posts were people doing MORE.
For weeks, I have been replaying the Rachel Hollis documentary, “Made For More” in my head. It struck a nerve with me and I haven’t quite been able to put my finger on what exactly it was. G wrote about it a few weeks ago in her blog, Love, Persistence and encouraged you to watch the documentary for yourself. All I can say is, sometimes we hear words and they don’t resonate or we aren’t ready to hear them; they need time to percolate. Those feelings that have been bubbling over all weekend? That was the message I received a few weeks ago finally boiling over. My frustration wasn’t about washing cars or running errands, it was about wanting MORE.
What does MORE look like? I don’t have the answer yet, but at least I know what question I need to be asking.
Sunshine & Sarcasm,
Lori & G