It turns out there is a reason many of these well-worn phrases have hung around for so long, they’re actually true.
In the last several months I’ve spent time with a few people who have had extended health challenges. Everything from a few years, nearly a year, to three weeks and counting.
From my view on the sidelines, what they all have in common is this experience of being on pause.
You’re waiting to get better. You’re waiting to feel better. You’re waiting.
And while you’re waiting, it’s hard to make plans for the future because it seems too far off, there’s too much to handle in the present moment, and you don’t feel well enough to really care. It’s constant triage of physical and mental manifestations of your diagnosis or lack thereof.
Before you know it, days and weeks become months and months turn into a few years. It can look a lot like everyone is moving forward without you.
But is that true? The seemingly “well ones” are running around but are we doing anything that matters? It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the fringe of life instead of actual life. We are stressing about a work email, or a deadline, or what to wear to an event.
Does any of that have meaning?
When you aren’t well you only have the capacity for what’s real, for what is meaningful to you. There simply isn’t enough energy or bandwidth for the minutiae.
I have seen the clarity that comes with illness. It’s a high price for such vision.
My colleague and friend who recently passed away had a crystalline view and it was laser like in its focus. She knew what had value for her. She didn’t have time for nonsense, small talk and chatter. She didn’t HAVE the time. She went deep in every conversation, all in. What other way was there to be?
While waiting for wellness looks like an extended pause it might be living life in its intended speed. Taking your time with the day to day experience. Taking your time with the people in your life. Maybe the the rest of us are in fast forward and we’re missing all the good parts.
Sunshine & Sarcasm,
Lowi & G