A few weeks ago, Lowi and I were together again in real life. It happens more now that I have moved. One of her daughters and I live in the same state, so when she travels to see her, I try to horn in on the fun like a dog sniffing out a treat.

We spent the weekend together doing the magnificent and the mundane: eating fabulous dinner, drinking fancy cocktails, watching Netflix, running errands, cooking breakfast, and taking the dogs out for potty breaks. 

There are unwritten rules and unspoken understandings that govern family relationships. There are also individual rules of engagement that are like shorthand with each person; Lowi is no different.

In a phrase – she is in charge.

She is the firstborn, a natural leader, and she knows how to knock out a to-do list. As the universe would have it, I am a middle child. I know, it’s OK. I will wait while you laugh. It’s a birth order joke, akin to ‘IYKYK’ (if you know, you know).

When we are together, our mirror neurons hop on the superhighway of familiarity, and my mindset shifts. I know how to be a soldier, if you will. I can take direction. It is not a myth that if you want to accomplish something, you can’t have too many people vying for the top spot, whether you are trying to run a Fortune 500 company or simply plan a party.

While we were out shopping for fun and purpose, we took a respite at Lowi’s retail mothership, Anthropologie. It’s the brick-and-mortar version of a glitzy vision board if you ask me. It manages to sell you an alternate version of your life in just a matter of seconds, complete with sequined sweaters, kitschy tea cups, and dinnerware on par with Priya Parker gatherings.

Quickly upon entering, Lowi saw a beautiful cozy sweater to her liking. What mothership worth its weight in steel wouldn’t serve up all the best selections? Naturally, there were colors available that suited both of our coloring. Lowi is a brown-eyed girl with olive skin tones, while I am her green-eyed sib who flushes pink easily.

Lowi decided we both needed one. We tried them on. We good-naturedly battled about whether she was going to buy it for me, and I don’t need to tell you who won.

Fast forward to this past Friday. I was wearing my new sweater because it had finally dipped under 60 degrees, and there was a welcome chill in the air. I was in the drive-thru at a local coffee shop and upon arriving at the window, the young woman who took my money exclaimed, “Oh my gosh, I love that sweater on you. It matches you.”

I laughed and graciously thanked her. I knew who I would tell first. I was driving, so I sent Lowi a video message relaying the experience. She quickly replied with the most OG older sister statement,

“Haha, I’m your older sister… I’m always right.”