This summer has been equal parts blur and slow motion. Time and how we experience it are weird that way. As we know, time passes the same way all the time, yet our perception of it can be dramatically different from moment to moment. 

For me, it’s been far more elastic than usual. There have been snippets of time that felt like they went on forever and others that went by so quickly that I almost questioned myself if they really happened at all.

I realized recently that it’s early August, yet I haven’t been in a pool all summer. I sold my condo in May, and it seems like I haven’t lived there in years instead of just shy of three months. I spent a few weeks in Colorado at the beginning of the summer, and it feels like a trip that I could easily convince myself happened last year. 

When life moves fast, and there is little routine, it’s hard to find moments that allow you to work through what has happened. I am pretty sure I have a backlog that needs to be assimilated. It’s like sending 900 different documents to your printer and then waiting for them all to process. It’s going to take a minute.

Today, we sit at the precipice of completing a home purchase and a move that’s been years in the making. Even though we have been working toward this for quite a while, it feels surreal that it’s nearly here. I wonder sometimes why some events happen, and we have no problem taking them in. And others almost sit at the periphery of our consciousness as if they are unable to sink through. We are slow to be able to absorb them.

We have lots of final tasks to complete and plans to make and finalize, but we will soon be on our way. Lowi has been sharing with us in recent weeks the bittersweet nature of seeing her kids leave home to chase their dreams. And I am starting to get the sense that it’s not going to be much different for me. I am about to embark on a big escapade, which brings with it excitement and, naturally, some nervousness. It’s a mixed bag, and I am OK with that. As I said a couple of months ago, there is always friction of some sort as you move toward something you want. There are uncertainties about making friends, finding a group you belong with, finding a new routine, and stepping one foot out of the circle I am in to become part of the one I haven’t yet met. To enter this new world, in some ways, I need to exit the one I currently am in. Two things can be true at the same time. I am full of hope and excitement. I am also unsure and nervous.

That’s how you know you are alive and good things are about to happen: You feel all the emotions, and sometimes all at once!