(L): It’s safe to say with all of the rest I have given my back that I am feeling much better. It sounds ridiculous, but now I am wondering why it was so difficult for me to actually rest. I kept walking or running just enough to keep my stamina up, but at the same time I continued to aggravate my back. It wasn’t until this past month became so busy that I literally had no time to do anything let alone get a good workout in that I actually let myself heal.
Over the last two weeks, I have also been very cognizant of my posture and where I sit while working on the laptop. By making a few adjustments and allowing my back to rest I have virtually gone from constant pain to no pain. I have not even been stiff when I wake up in the morning so I know I am on the right track.
On the downside, I have also given in to all of my bad eating habits and I am slightly terrified to get on the scale. Yesterday, when I realized I was free of back pain I decided to get back on the wagon with all of it. I started my morning off with a protein shake and walked the beasts. They are the happiest that I am back at it.
I now have a mere 11 weeks until we go on vacation and if you recall I am only one third of the way to my goals. I am supposed to be fit, fabulous and 47 by the end of July and all I have managed so far is the 47. It’s a sad state of affairs, folks. I refuse to fall into my crazy trap of working myself into back pain again though. I am starting off slow. I am walking for a few days and if that continues to go well I will add a little running back in. Next week, I will try to add back in my weights and see how things go. I had planned to run the Slacker Half Marathon again this year, which is at the end of June, but I have not committed yet. I am realizing that being able to walk is way more important than thinner thighs or a flat belly. What can I say, I am a slow learner, but I am a work in progress.
(G): I had an epic high this week followed by a searing low. The high came after I saw my friend and fascia guru on Friday and my foot felt amazing. Absolutely zero pain and when I got up Saturday morning I felt great. Without a twinge of discomfort, what does a girl do? I headed directly to the trail. I was trying to play it smart since I haven’t really done any major running in a month and opted to walk. I felt good and so did my foot. I pondered going the full length of the trail, which would’ve been seven miles but I even tempered that trying not to tempt fate.
It seems fate was already going to trip me up. By the time the day was up my foot was sore and I was back to where I was 30 hours before. I hit yet another rock bottom. I thought I had already been at my lowest but no, no, I could go lower. And I did.
I was crushed. Then on Sunday I went out for a walk again and thought I could just ease my way, or will my way, through it. Same result.
Alright karma, fate, life or whatever you want to call yourself, you win! This is clearly going to go your way.
Then Sunday night I read this post:
It was just what I needed. I don’t know when this issue is going to resolve itself and pushing against it isn’t working. I have to release it. So what’s left? Focusing on what I can do.
As of Sunday (I started a day early but whatever) I am all in for May with the elements that are under my control. I can crush my core like a boss. I can ride the bike all day long if I want to. I can hit the weights hard. I can do all my rehab with even more focus and intent. And I can get really honest with myself about my diet. I don’t have the calorie burn that I normally have and all my dietary sins are coming to rest at my hips, thighs and belly. And a muffin top, OK a bigger muffin top, is not going to be what gives me a better attitude.
I can do so many things that will ultimately help my running once I am back at it. I don’t know when that will be. It might be weeks or months but in the context of my life it’s likely a short period of time. I plan to run forever so months isn’t all that long, right? Maybe my racing season won’t actually get started in earnest until November. Maybe this will be the year I plow through winter, snowy races because while all the rest of the runners are beat up I will just be getting started. And I will have frustration to burn and mental anguish to release.
Wow, that sort of turned into a crazy, ranting manifesto there. It’s OK, don’t worry.
On the positive front, my fascia guru, as I like to call her, did refer me to a physical therapist who does gait analysis for runners. I have to wait until May 10 but she may be the missing person on my team. She is also a runner so at least she will speak my language.
I feel better with this new focus because I have a goal. I need to have something to look forward to. Thinking about races that I may not be able to run wasn’t really the motivating spirit I needed. However, the idea of pushing myself in new ways and training hard in the peripheral disciplines to running really lights a fire under my feet and keeps me from feeling adrift. Here’s to what I can do!
Sunshine & Sarcasm,
Lowi & G