Rethinking a Holiday

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For quite some time I’ve been on the anti-side of Valentine’s Day. It felt forced, disingenuous and everything that, in my mind, love is not.
I’ve often equated Valentine’s day with guilt and expectation.
Stereotypically, women are painted as the ever-demanding recipient of all kinds of Valentine treats including dinner, flowers and candy. And men are motivated out of guilt and the desire to avoid a fight.
The idea that this one day makes a relationship I have found objectionable.
But Saturday, my resolve may have wavered a bit.
I saw a young boy at the grocery clutching a bouquet of tulips and he was intently going thorough cards to find just the right one.
His Dad came around to hurry him along and it became clear that he was buying for his mom. There wasn’t any guilt, expectation or apparent coercion in this process.
He wanted to get it right because it was important to him.
Purity of action.
He was clear that it had to be the perfect card and tulips for his mom.

Intentional kindness.
Intentional love.

Let’s be clear, I still think all that other stuff is nonsense and the antithesis of love but I am open to this kind of expression.
Showing love, caring on purpose, feels good to everyone: giver and receiver.
I even broke down and made my husband cinnamon rolls and a card. Because he knows my feelings about this holiday all to well, he laughed.

I must be mellowing because I even mailed Valentine cards out this year. I did so, less because it’s Valentines per se, and more because many in my family could use a little extra love. And despite all our evolution and technological advances, I believe there is still something uplifting about getting the mail and finding a note just for you.
It’s like a little envelope of joy.
As we continue through February I’m looking for ways to intentionally show kindness, intentionally express love.
And it really helps my heart, too.

Sunshine & Sarcasm,

Lowi & G

 

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