I have had some great learning experiences lately and, much like Lowi mentioned the other day, when people show you who they are… you should believe them. Similarly so, when it seems like someone doesn’t value you, your time, or your contribution — they don’t. So stop already.

All it really means is you are not in their tribe, they are not in yours. It doesn’t mean war just stop forcing it and accept.

Some relationships, moments and connections are simple from the beginning. They click (not to be confused with clique.)

And others (and you know it almost immediately whether you admit it or not) are forced. You make excuses, you bend yourself a little, you box yourself up a little more, trying to make it work. As Brené Brown, our guru, would say, you’re hustling for worthiness.

Thankfully, and I do mean this sincerely, I had these two kinds of opposing experiences in a short span of time lately. And that juxtaposition was needed. These experiences butted up against one another. They collided in my brain when I thought about them. Their incongruencies were unmistakable as was how I felt about them.

Feeling worthy
Hustling to feel worthy

Anyway you dress it up, that’s what it is. Why use more words when these say it all.

Some relationships and interactions allow me to feel instantly like I am part of the group and further I know I want these people to be part of mine. We are in the same tribe.

And others leave you feeling more like you need triage. You walk away feeling a little emotionally worn from trying to push and twist your way into this belonging that feels unnatural.

I am getting too old to hustle, to not feel worthy and to be making excuses. Aren’t we all?

We don’t like everyone, we’re likely not supposed to. Everyone doesn’t like us, they’re likely not supposed to (that’s a tough pill, I know)

But let’s be honest with ourselves about it. Next time you walk away from a social experience, ask yourself: “Did I feel tribe-worthy or triage-needing?”

When you get the answer, believe it!

Sunshine & Sarcasm,

Lowi & G