Jen Hatmaker wrote a little diatribe about being at her limit last week.  Not the kind of limit G was trying to find on the course. No, Jen had hit her limit at home.  Her hubby had added a new app on his phone that could track the speed in which his kids were driving.  She was done and couldn’t take anymore.

I get it Jen! I feel like my hubby and yours would be besties if we lived next door. My hubby is also a “stalker,” I mean, great parent who watches over our teenager and adult children with the utmost care.

Jen talked about hitting her limit with all things parenting because let’s face it, there are a lot of things. Guys, there are so many ways to stalk our children these days and sometimes we just have to say enough!

We have ways to find them via their phones, we have cameras installed and social media to see what they are up to. It’s great and if God forbid they didn’t answer their phones we can still find them!

Sometimes though there is a limit. I know some of you disagree because if the technology is  available you should use it. Right? I know you want to use it and you can.  I just don’t want to hear about it nor do I want to even see you stalking our children because it stresses me out. Why?  Well, I wasn’t sure why it bothered me until I read her blog.

Jen described having her fill with her list of parenting responsibilities.  I can empathize because I already feel like a responsible party to their emotional well being, which if we are are being honest is a full-time job with three daughters. I know that two thirds live in another state, but they still call to share, vent and basically get their emotional state tuned up on the daily. Then there is the 17-year-old who still lives at home and needs not only emotional support, but food,  clothing, medical care, and let’s not forget the meetings, appointments, constant reminders and college applications.  Need I say more? The list is long and while I am not managing my older daughters’ schedules, they feel the need to tell me about them.

It’s wonderful and I wouldn’t change a thing.

Okay maybe I would tell one of them that I don’t need to know about every single thought and feeling that crosses through her mind, body and spirit.

 

I feel so fortunate to be part of their lives, but it’s a lot some days and weeks. So when your hubby wants to add another tool to check on them I just want to go to bed and watch Netflix. It puts me right over the proverbial edge. I am full up on the checkin!

Listen up, parents whose love is so great they need these tools to feel reassured. One day these tools are going to backfire. I’ve seen it happen and it’s not pretty.

One day they are going to be somewhere that they aren’t supposed to be and you are going to question all of your parenting up to this point and then what? We have already told them that we love them and trust them and we have given them our car to drive and their very own phones and now we are basically following them around to be sure they don’t make a mistake.

Oh they are going to flub up, I guarantee it.

So what’s a caring, loving parent to do with all this technology at their fingertips? Use it, but do so sparingly.  Try not to get so caught up in knowing their every move that you don’t even need to ask about their day.

And seriously, for those of us who want to bury our heads in the sand and pretend that it’s 1985 please let us have some peace.