It’s one of the four letter words you can utter without fear of having your mouth washed out with soap. But it’s one that many of us avoid because asking for it feels, well, a lot like having your mouth washed out with soap.
It can be hard to need others. It can be tough to say I can’t do this on my own. But the truth is we all need help from time and time and we don’t always ask for it.
This week our Dad had his hip replaced and needless to say there’s a lot he can’t do on his own. And, truth be told, there’s a lot we won’t let him do on his own.
This may be one of those times that he wishes he had raised a house full of boys instead of girls. A son would throw you a stale Pop-Tart and Slim Jim and say I’ll see you later.
Daughters, and wives, we take a much different approach. We tend to hover, anticipate and … maybe smother at times.
But he needs help and I am sure that gets old really fast. Every move he makes is commented upon, critiqued and analyzed and that’s all before the physical therapist shows up.
When you are the one offering the help, it’s easy. You want to be of service. You want to make life easier. But when you are the one receiving it can be a mixed bag. You appreciate it but you loathe that you need it all at the same time.
Just this week, my yoga pal filled in for me more than once so I could be with my family. While I would do the same for her and think nothing of it, I resisted being on the receiving end of that generosity.
Receiving help can make us feel so vulnerable. Nobody seeks being in that space but it can be a teacher. It reminds us that we all need help.
It’s an ebb and flow in life. Sometimes we receive more than we give and sometimes we give more than we receive. We hope it balances out in the end.
Sunshine & Sarcasm,
Lowi & G